Expectation Is the Thief of Gratitude
I love my staff more than makes sense.
Which is probably why nothing frustrates me more than trying to make them happy… and failing.
Trying to make people happy is hard.
Trying to make everyone happy? Impossible.
And yet—I keep trying.
I get so excited about ideas to give back to the staff.
Giddy, even.
Like I can’t wait to roll it out, to surprise them, to make their day a little easier or a little better.
And then…
someone complains.
Or pushes back.
Or responds with an attitude I didn’t expect.
And just like that—
I deflate.
The wind is knocked out of my sails.
The thing that gave me energy, that made me feel generous and excited, suddenly becomes heavy.
A task.
A burden.
I still do it.
Of course I do.
But now, instead of excitement, I brace.
Because one or two negative responses somehow drown out the twenty good ones.
And I hate that about myself.
Sometimes I wonder if the Lord feels the same way about me.
If He ever rolls something out in my life with excitement—
only to watch me complain about it.
He removes something or someone that isn’t good for me,
thinking, This will bring her peace.
And I curse Him.
He brings someone new into my life—
a gift of a human—
thinking, Maybe this time she’ll see she deserves something good.
And I spiral.
Overthink.
Pull away.
Convince myself I am too much.
He gives me an opportunity—
a way to ease financial stress—
and I complain about how much work it takes.
He gives me talents—
things that fill me, things that could help other people—
and I tell Him it’s not enough.
Not enough reach.
Not enough impact.
Not enough anything.
So I consider quitting.
Over and over again.
And then there are the things I don’t even notice anymore.
My health.
Breath in my lungs.
A body that works.
My job.
One I love.
Paychecks that show up on time.
People I genuinely care about.
My family.
Healthy. Kind. Steady.
My friends.
The kind who defend me in rooms I’m not in.
Who love me better than I love myself some days.
My home.
Safe. Warm. Mine.
My car.
My clothes.
My coffee.
Food. Water.
Anytime I want. Without thinking twice.
Delivery services. Streaming services. Convenience on demand.
The list goes on and on…
And somewhere along the way,
all of it stopped feeling like a gift
and started feeling like an expectation.
And expectation ruins gratefulness.
Because when it’s there, I don’t notice it.
But when it’s gone?
Oh—then He hears from me.
The prayers.
The frustration.
The anger.
The begging.
But rarely the thank you.
I have a way of ruining the gifts I’ve been given.
Sometimes by turning them into expectations.
Sometimes by rejecting them outright.
Sometimes by receiving them with a bad attitude.
And the only person that really affects…is me.
Because the one who focuses on what’s wrong with the gift
is the one who never gets to enjoy it.
Luckily, God is not the kind of manager I am.
He doesn’t deflate.
He doesn’t get discouraged by my responses.
My lack of gratitude doesn’t ruin His goodness.
But it does ruin my ability to see it.
And maybe that’s the real consequence.
Not that He stops giving—
but that I stop recognizing.
That I start calling blessings burdens.
Gifts inconveniences.
Provision pressure.
That I twist something freely given
into something heavy He never asked me to carry.
Until I believe—really believe—
that He works all things together for good…
I will keep missing it.
I will keep seeing curses where there are blessings.
Problems where there is provision.
Loss where there is protection.
And I will keep wondering
why I feel so empty
while standing in the middle of abundance.
If this resonated with you, you might also like:
Love is Never Wasted: If you’ve ever questioned whether something was “worth it,” this one is a reminder that love is never wasted—even when it doesn’t last.
Friendship is Not Disposable: If you’ve ever been quick to write someone off—or felt written off yourself—this one challenges the way we define “toxic.”
Grays: If you struggle with seeing things as all good or all bad, this one explores the messy middle where most of life actually happens.
